Ok so I am going to rant now. Since people tend to get sick of my ranting, so time to make use of blog again.
Most of it is about my awesome (read awful) job, and I am wondering if I should be tactful here in case my boss reads it, or should just let all boundaries down. Hmm let's see how this goes.
So the only good thing about my job is that I don't hate it in its entirety. What I hate is that there is just too much to do. And too few people to do it, since this is a start-up. And since my job description does not exist, so everything that they can think up of is dumped on me (Yep tact's being flung out the window right this minute).
So keeping in touch with speakers, getting them to send me their presentations is in itself a rocky mountain to hike up. considering they are all CEOs and GMs and high-up-there people from high-up-there companies like GM, Volkswagen, Mahindra, etc. Then once I get it, I need to pester boss to take a look at them, which in itself takes a few weeks. But once that is done, I am expected to send the feedback out within seconds. As I have been reminded many times, as I struggle to look up at my boss from under the gigantic workload pressing down on my back, speakers are a priority. Then after giving them feedback, I need to chase them if they don't reply. Only 1 out of 10 replies. So this means another round of calls. Plus I need to remind them to put information about the conference on their websites, get their guests, register for the event, send visa letter, etc etc etc. Btw lots of speakers have cancelled, because, well, they are busy people. Everytime this happens, I am given the "I am disappointed" speech. Like it's my fault he had back surgery and his doctor hasn't cleared him for travel.
Then there are associations and media, which I haven't had the time to touch since after I got their logos. But then suddenly, my boss will ask me, so what is the media list attending the event, and me, being incapable of lying convincingly, will gape at him like a goldfish. Then I shall be reminded, it is very important to know these things. Right. I'll get right on it, after I finish the other 100 things on my priority list. Yes, I really hope my boss never comes across this post. Is there a way to limit readership?
Then of course there is social media. LinkedIn is to my boss as the unicorn toy was to the little girl in Despicable Me, a shiny light in the darkness, a wondrous invention of the Free World. And so I was forced to make a profile, micro-managed to an excruciating degree to get it exactly the way he wanted it. And now, I am expected to find articles and post there everyday. And for every post I will be told, oh it's okay, just post, don't need to ask me. Then once I do post, no-no change the heading, change the text. We had social media training as well, whose first session went on till 9 plus. And it was only after violent objections that the next few ones end at 7. From these trainings we learnt how to soft-sell, so entire days used to be spent deciding on the most appropriate text which does not sound too sales-y. Then once we have discussions going, I must add everyone who has commented on it. Then once they are connected, I should invite them to our LinkedIn group. Bleh.
And oh-oh-oh we have a new blog too. So looking after websites and blogs becomes my job too. So in 40 minutes every morning, find news, post 1 on blog, 1 on conference website, then post on LinkedIn. Oh and change the home page every week.
And there are lots of competition conferences coming up. Any everytime they post on LinkedIn, or use the same speakers as us, all hell breaks loose.
Then of course, I am supposedly good at writing. So yay, write articles as well. About something I know nothing about. So go read up a 100 other articles so at least I know what the hell EVs are and what batteries are used and how recharging can be done, etc etc etc. And now it will be excellent if I could write articles on the LinkedIn discussions we have going. I should also interview speakers and write articles on that.
This is all obviously in addition to the at least 20 emails a day which should be followed up on, preferably asap. And now I have been told I need to do the agenda (I just finished it). I do not understand why, considering doing the brochure was supposed to be someone else's task. Plus, there is the bible which will be given to all delegates, and I need to do that as well.
And when I ask my bosses questions, I am 'disturbing' them. Since they are so busy, doing God only knows what. But they are allowed to pester me whenever they so choose.
A newsletter must go out every 2 weeks, through the most horrible software mankind came up with, Constant Contact. It is so buggy it amazes me people pay for it. Links you put up magically disappear, it is up to the software's mercy if and when it will allow you to change font, the colors of the block headings can only be changed globally. Then every block will have a different shade of the same color, with nothing you can do about it. This is of course supposed to be approved by my micro-managing 'perfectionist' (in his own words) boss, who at 6pm and after 4 newsletters have been previously send out, decides that the color theme is not good. So it should changed. So I must stay back and do it.
By the way, work is 1.5 hours away. So 3 hours of travelling everyday.
So that was work. The rest of my life sucks too.
I am currently in the middle of shifting. Half the stuff in one room, half in another. I have 2 tuitions, 1 wants me to come twice during weekend (since I can't make it on weekdays), and the other is again 1.5 hours away (and on a voluntary basis too btw).
I will be working till the end of August, which means I will have to work around my timetable. Everyday that I take "off" to attend classes will offend my bosses since I am not around being a mule for them.
I do not have time to meet the professors whom I need to request to be my mentor for USP Advanced Modules. My FYP results are still not out. I have another job at Science Dean's office during the semester which I had applied for before I got this one. I have two 8-10 am lectures, two 7-10 pm lectures. 2 compulsory lectures where I'm allowed to skip only 1 class in the whole semester, which I don't know how I am going to manage since I'm going to be in Beijing for a week at least.
Life is so awesome. Did I mention I'm being paid peanuts?
p.s. Happy Birthday sista!
p.p.s. Some of the articles I have written:
http://www.ev-li-ionbatteryforum.com/afghanistan-lithium-reserves-–-how-will-they-impact-the-cost-of-the-li-ion-batteries/
http://www.evbatterynews.com/re-branding-the-electric-cars/
http://www.ev-li-ionbatteryforum.com/mining-firms-and-car-manufacturers-whats-the-deal/
http://www.ev-li-ionbatteryforum.com/what-is-the-best-way-to-recharge-buses/
p.p.p.s My bosses decided to give me a bonus yesterday for 'working so hard'. So now I feel a little guilty about writing this post. I shall re-double my prayers that they never chance upon my blog.
Friday, July 30, 2010
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
ShitMyDadSays
No. Humans will die out. We're weak. Dinosaurs survived on rotten flesh. You got diarrhea last week from a Wendy's.
YOU, a published writer?..Internet don't count. Any asshole can throw shit up on there.
Engagement rings are pointless. Indians gave cows...Oh sorry, congrats on proposing. We good now? Can I finish my indian story?
You seen my cell phone?...What’s it look like? Like two horses fucking. It’s a phone, son. It looks like a phone.
Stop trying so hard. He doesn't like you. Jesus, don't kiss an ass if it's in the process of shitting on you.
It’s Los Angeles, son. It’s the epicenter of the asshole earthquake. They’d fuck you twice if they had another dick.
I’m not sure you can call that roughing it, son… Well, for one, there was a fucking minivan parked forty feet from your sleeping bags.
War hero? No. I was a doc in Vietnam. My job was to say "This is what happens when you screw a hooker, kid. Put this cream on your pecker.
HIDDEN roaming charges? Jesus, Sprint has 'fucking people' down to a science, like they practice it in a fucking lab on mice first.
Science and Mother Nature are in a marriage where Science is always surprised to come home and find Mother Nature blowing the neighbor.
A parent's only as good as their dumbest kid. If one wins a Nobel Prize but the other gets robbed by a hooker, you failed.
I don't get it; I sweat, I smell fine. You sweat, you smell like mule shit...Relax, she's on the treadmill next to you, she knows.
Don't mess with him...Trust me, you don't fuck with a man that sleeps next to a woman he never screws. They're unpredictable.
Mom is smarter than you...No? Well, ask yourself this; has mom ever unknowingly had toilet paper hanging out of her ass?...Mom 1. You 0
We're out of Grape Nuts... No, what's left is for me. Sorry, I should have said "You're out of Grape Nuts.
I just want silence. Jesus, it doesn't mean I don't like you. It just means right now, I like silence more.
It's never the right time to have kids, but it's always the right time for screwing. God's not a dumbshit. He knows how it works.
I don't need more friends. You got friends and all they do is ask you to help them move. Fuck that. I'm old. I'm through moving shit.
You look just like Stephen Hawking...Relax, I meant like a non-paralyzed version of him. Feel better?... Fine. Forget I said it.
Son, no one gives a shit about all the things your cell phone does. You didn't invent it, you just bought it. Anybody can do that.
Oh please, you practically invented lazy. People should have to call you and ask for the rights to lazy before they use it.
You worry too much. Eat some bacon... What? No, I got no idea if it'll make you feel better, I just made too much bacon.
If mom calls, tell her I'm shitting... Son, marriage is about not having to lie about taking a shit.
The baby will talk when he talks, relax. It ain't like he knows the cure for cancer and he just ain't spitting it out.
I like the dog. If he can't eat it, or fuck it, he pisses on it. I can get behind that.
Remember how you used to make fun of me for being bald?...No, I'm not gonna make a joke. I'll let your mirror do that.
That woman was sexy...Out of your league? Son. Let women figure out why they won't screw you, don't do it for them.
Does anyone your age know how to comb their fucking hair? It looks like two squirrels crawled on their head and started fucking.
don't ever say stuff just because you think you should. That's the definition of an asshole.
No, you can not borrow my t-shirt...How about instead of standing there looking shocked, you do your fucking laundry?
Why the fuck would I want to live to 100? I'm 73 and shit's starting to get boring. By the way, there's no money left when I go, just fyi.
The worst thing you can be is a liar....Okay fine, yes, the worst thing you can be is a Nazi, but THEN, number two is liar. Nazi 1, Liar 2.
Who in the fuck is tila tequila? Is she a stripper?...That's her? Yeah, that's a stripper, son, I don't give a shit what you say.
You know, sometimes it's nice having you around. But now ain't one of those times. Now gimme the remote we're not watching this bullshit.
The dog don't like you planting stuff there. It's his backyard. If you're the only one who shits in something, you own it. Remember that.
How the fuck should I know if it's still good? Eat it. You get sick, it wasn't good. You people, you think I got microscopic fucking eyes.
Don't touch the bacon, it's not done yet. You let me handle the bacon, and i'll let you handle..what ever it is you do. I guess nothing.
Your mother made a batch of meatballs last night. Some are for you, some are for me, but more are for me. Remember that. More. Me.
Your brother brought his baby over this morning. He told me it could stand. It couldn't stand for shit. Just sat there. Big let down.
The dog is not bored, it's a fucking dog. It's not like he's waiting for me to give him a fucking rubix cube. He's a god damned dog.
It's watering plants, Justin. You just take a God damned hose and you put it over the plant. You don't even pay rent, just do it. Shit.
Why would i want to check a voicemail on my cell phone? People want to talk to me, call again. If i want to talk to you, I'll answer.
YOU, a published writer?..Internet don't count. Any asshole can throw shit up on there.
Engagement rings are pointless. Indians gave cows...Oh sorry, congrats on proposing. We good now? Can I finish my indian story?
You seen my cell phone?...What’s it look like? Like two horses fucking. It’s a phone, son. It looks like a phone.
Stop trying so hard. He doesn't like you. Jesus, don't kiss an ass if it's in the process of shitting on you.
It’s Los Angeles, son. It’s the epicenter of the asshole earthquake. They’d fuck you twice if they had another dick.
I’m not sure you can call that roughing it, son… Well, for one, there was a fucking minivan parked forty feet from your sleeping bags.
War hero? No. I was a doc in Vietnam. My job was to say "This is what happens when you screw a hooker, kid. Put this cream on your pecker.
HIDDEN roaming charges? Jesus, Sprint has 'fucking people' down to a science, like they practice it in a fucking lab on mice first.
Science and Mother Nature are in a marriage where Science is always surprised to come home and find Mother Nature blowing the neighbor.
A parent's only as good as their dumbest kid. If one wins a Nobel Prize but the other gets robbed by a hooker, you failed.
I don't get it; I sweat, I smell fine. You sweat, you smell like mule shit...Relax, she's on the treadmill next to you, she knows.
Don't mess with him...Trust me, you don't fuck with a man that sleeps next to a woman he never screws. They're unpredictable.
Mom is smarter than you...No? Well, ask yourself this; has mom ever unknowingly had toilet paper hanging out of her ass?...Mom 1. You 0
We're out of Grape Nuts... No, what's left is for me. Sorry, I should have said "You're out of Grape Nuts.
I just want silence. Jesus, it doesn't mean I don't like you. It just means right now, I like silence more.
It's never the right time to have kids, but it's always the right time for screwing. God's not a dumbshit. He knows how it works.
I don't need more friends. You got friends and all they do is ask you to help them move. Fuck that. I'm old. I'm through moving shit.
You look just like Stephen Hawking...Relax, I meant like a non-paralyzed version of him. Feel better?... Fine. Forget I said it.
Son, no one gives a shit about all the things your cell phone does. You didn't invent it, you just bought it. Anybody can do that.
Oh please, you practically invented lazy. People should have to call you and ask for the rights to lazy before they use it.
You worry too much. Eat some bacon... What? No, I got no idea if it'll make you feel better, I just made too much bacon.
If mom calls, tell her I'm shitting... Son, marriage is about not having to lie about taking a shit.
The baby will talk when he talks, relax. It ain't like he knows the cure for cancer and he just ain't spitting it out.
I like the dog. If he can't eat it, or fuck it, he pisses on it. I can get behind that.
Remember how you used to make fun of me for being bald?...No, I'm not gonna make a joke. I'll let your mirror do that.
That woman was sexy...Out of your league? Son. Let women figure out why they won't screw you, don't do it for them.
Does anyone your age know how to comb their fucking hair? It looks like two squirrels crawled on their head and started fucking.
don't ever say stuff just because you think you should. That's the definition of an asshole.
No, you can not borrow my t-shirt...How about instead of standing there looking shocked, you do your fucking laundry?
Why the fuck would I want to live to 100? I'm 73 and shit's starting to get boring. By the way, there's no money left when I go, just fyi.
The worst thing you can be is a liar....Okay fine, yes, the worst thing you can be is a Nazi, but THEN, number two is liar. Nazi 1, Liar 2.
Who in the fuck is tila tequila? Is she a stripper?...That's her? Yeah, that's a stripper, son, I don't give a shit what you say.
You know, sometimes it's nice having you around. But now ain't one of those times. Now gimme the remote we're not watching this bullshit.
The dog don't like you planting stuff there. It's his backyard. If you're the only one who shits in something, you own it. Remember that.
How the fuck should I know if it's still good? Eat it. You get sick, it wasn't good. You people, you think I got microscopic fucking eyes.
Don't touch the bacon, it's not done yet. You let me handle the bacon, and i'll let you handle..what ever it is you do. I guess nothing.
Your mother made a batch of meatballs last night. Some are for you, some are for me, but more are for me. Remember that. More. Me.
Your brother brought his baby over this morning. He told me it could stand. It couldn't stand for shit. Just sat there. Big let down.
The dog is not bored, it's a fucking dog. It's not like he's waiting for me to give him a fucking rubix cube. He's a god damned dog.
It's watering plants, Justin. You just take a God damned hose and you put it over the plant. You don't even pay rent, just do it. Shit.
Why would i want to check a voicemail on my cell phone? People want to talk to me, call again. If i want to talk to you, I'll answer.
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Saturday, July 24, 2010
And I close my eyes and pray...
Death is a reality, which somehow never feels real. So many people around seem to be passing away recently. When you were younger, at least for me, death seemed like such a distant thing. Sure, people passed away. But they were strangers. Not someone you really gave a second thought to.
In university, somehow, it seems so much more of a reality. Every month or so, you hear of someone. Or see on Facebook even. How someone used to comment on this person's pics, and the next month, they have an RIP profile pic for the same person.
Maybe it's because when you were small, your parents protected you from such news. But now, everytime I hear of someone else, I think of all the older ones.
I always have this fear that I will say something horribly rude to someone and walk away, like I so often do, content in the assumption that I will make it right later. Or I will drift apart from someone, and convince myself I will get back in touch with them when I'm more free. But what if I never get that chance? What if I live the rest of my life in regret?
I know this is quite shallow, to make this about me, but I really do worry about it often :(
In university, somehow, it seems so much more of a reality. Every month or so, you hear of someone. Or see on Facebook even. How someone used to comment on this person's pics, and the next month, they have an RIP profile pic for the same person.
Maybe it's because when you were small, your parents protected you from such news. But now, everytime I hear of someone else, I think of all the older ones.
I always have this fear that I will say something horribly rude to someone and walk away, like I so often do, content in the assumption that I will make it right later. Or I will drift apart from someone, and convince myself I will get back in touch with them when I'm more free. But what if I never get that chance? What if I live the rest of my life in regret?
I know this is quite shallow, to make this about me, but I really do worry about it often :(
Friday, July 23, 2010
a wish
Can we pretend every clover had 4 leaves
What if every goody bag had more treats
would any body even have a clue
probably not and it's scary cause it's true
what if everybody paid attention to detail
and if all guys didn't objectify a female
Imagine we wern't conditioned like this
if money didn't have the power that it is
if every airplane was a shooting star
do you know what you would actually wish for
can we pretend every dandelion was an angel
you could be yourself without being shameful
What if every wish you made come true
What would this world actually come too
this world could never be perfect
everybody's made that wish but it's not worth it
can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars
i could really use a wish right now, wish right now, wish right now
What if every goody bag had more treats
would any body even have a clue
probably not and it's scary cause it's true
what if everybody paid attention to detail
and if all guys didn't objectify a female
Imagine we wern't conditioned like this
if money didn't have the power that it is
if every airplane was a shooting star
do you know what you would actually wish for
can we pretend every dandelion was an angel
you could be yourself without being shameful
What if every wish you made come true
What would this world actually come too
this world could never be perfect
everybody's made that wish but it's not worth it
can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars
i could really use a wish right now, wish right now, wish right now
Real
Look at me I'm twenty three
Beautiful a sight to see
Tonight
A little dress to draw the press
And I'll be leaving
All the rest behind
Well be pleased girl
If this is what you wanted
The whole world is watching you take the stage
What will you say
Aren't I lovely
And do you want me cause
I am hungry for something that will make me real
Can you see me and
Do you love me cause
I am desperately searching for something
Real
I close my eyes imagine time
Will not forget
My sacrifice
I numb the ache and decorate
My emptiness
Stand naked in the light
Well be pleased world
If this is what you wanted
This young girl is everything that you made
What will she say
Aren't I lovely
And do you want me cause
I am hungry for something that will make me real
Can you see me and
Do you love me cause
I am desperately searching for something
Real
The world goes home
The lights go down
My lipstick fades
Away
And do you want me cause
I am hungry for something that will make me real
Can you see me and
Do you love me cause
I am desperately searching for something
Real
Beautiful a sight to see
Tonight
A little dress to draw the press
And I'll be leaving
All the rest behind
Well be pleased girl
If this is what you wanted
The whole world is watching you take the stage
What will you say
Aren't I lovely
And do you want me cause
I am hungry for something that will make me real
Can you see me and
Do you love me cause
I am desperately searching for something
Real
I close my eyes imagine time
Will not forget
My sacrifice
I numb the ache and decorate
My emptiness
Stand naked in the light
Well be pleased world
If this is what you wanted
This young girl is everything that you made
What will she say
Aren't I lovely
And do you want me cause
I am hungry for something that will make me real
Can you see me and
Do you love me cause
I am desperately searching for something
Real
The world goes home
The lights go down
My lipstick fades
Away
And do you want me cause
I am hungry for something that will make me real
Can you see me and
Do you love me cause
I am desperately searching for something
Real
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Coz silly quotes make life a little better
"Treat me like an angel and I'll be your lil' devil."
Men, chocolate, and coffee are all better rich.
"Keep smiling, it makes people wonder what you're up to."
Procrastinate now, don't put it off.
Never think about the mistakes you made. Think about the mistakes you will make.
All trespassers will be shot on sight. All survivors will then be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law. Have a nice day!
"We are going to rip off your testicles.......and slash your tires." - Nip
I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.
42.7% of all statistics are made up on the spot.
A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.
The sooner you fall behind the more time you'll have to catch up.
All those who believe in telekinesis, raise my hand.
The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
OK, so what's the speed of dark?
Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.
Hard work pays off in the future, laziness pays off now.
I intend to live forever -- so far, so good.
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
My mechanic told me, "I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder."
Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
A conclusion is the part where you got tired of thinking.
Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.
The only reason I am always listening to music is to drown out the sound of your voice!
"Careful with that light at the end of the tunnel, it might be another train coming."
Don't drink and drive you might spill your beer.
If you can't fix it with duck tape you haven't used enough
Smile, and the world will smile with you. Laugh and they'll all think you're on drugs.
Where there's a will, there's a way. And where there's a way, then there's usually a stop sign somewhere along the road.
loved by some, hated by many, envied by most, yet wanted by plenty!
"I didn't lose my mind, I sold it on ebay."
Constipated People Don't Give A crap.
If You Can Read This, I've Lost My Trailer.
The Earth Is Full - Go Home.
So Many Pedestrians - So Little Time.
Cleverly Disguised As A Responsible Adult.
If We Quit Voting, Will They All Go Away?
Eat Right, Exercise, Die Anyway.
Illiterate? Write For Help
Honk If Anything Falls Off.
Cover Me, I'm Changing Lanes.
He Who Hesitates Is Not Only Lost, But Miles From The Next Exit.
You! Out Of The Gene Pool - Now!
I Do Whatever My Rice Krispies Tell Me To.
Fight Crime: Shoot Back!
Remember Folks: Stop Lights Timed For 35 mph Are Also Timed For 70 mph.
Guys: No Shirt, No Service. Gals: No Shirt, No Charge
If Walking Is So Good For You, Then Why Does My Mailman Look Like Jabba The Hut?
Boldly Going Nowhere.
Caution - Driver Legally Blonde.
Honk If You've Never Seen An Uzi Fired From A Car Window.
How Many Roads Must A Man Travel Down Before He Admits He is Lost?
All Men Are Animals; Some Just Make Better Pets.
"POLITICIANS & DIAPERS BOTH NEED TO BE CHANGED, AND FOR THE SAME REASON"
"i'm not tailgating, i'm keeping up with the pace car"
Roadhead cures Roadrage...
Tell your girlfriend I said thanks
" WARNING: in case of rapture, this car will be driverless. "
normal people worry me
you say physco like it's a bad thing
those who think they know everything, annoy those of us that do
This delinquent is having sex with your honor student.
Save the environment...plant a Bush back in Texas.
don't regret doing things, regret getting caught
None of us are virgins, life has screwed us all
"my tears for you are like dark chocolate- bitter sweet and probably no good for me."
If you love somebody, they shouldn't make you cry, they should be worth crying over.
"I'm going to live life or die trying"
im sugar and spice and everything nice if u wanna mess with me u better think twice
"We didn’t lose.....we just ran out of time"
"Here officer, hold my beer while I find my license."
"You will be aroused by a shampoo comercial."--Homer J. Simpson
If you die, I'll kill you!"
The only reason that I talk to myself is because that I'm the only one whose answers I accept.
"Find a guy that adores you and not one that you adore!!" MOM
Learn from the mistakes of others, because you can't live long enough to make them all yourself.
"Birdie, birdie, in the sky, why'd you do that in my eye? Looks like sugar, tastes like sap. OMG! IT'S BIRDIE CRAP!"
"Inside this body lies that of a skinny lady. But I can usually shut her up with chocolate."
They say the truth will set you free. But then why is it that every time I tell the truth I get sent to my room?
Men are like pennies: two-faced and worthless.
You tried, and you failed, so the lesson is, never try. - Homer J. Simpson.
"Is tuna really Chicken?" - Jessica Simpson, after reading "Tuna, Chicken of the sea"
"I did my homework! I just forgot to write it down."
Roses are red, violets are blue, please flush the toilet, after you.
"Some people drink from the fountain of knowledge, others just gurgle."
"When they put unknown at the end of a quote, that means they probably don't no how to spell anonymous" -unknown
"I'll kill you until you die!!"
"I'm not scared of dying, I just don't want to!"
"Dilbert's Words of Wisdom: You're slower than a herd of turtles stampeding through peanut butter."
"I tried sniffing coke once, but the ice cubes stuck in my nose"
"The whole world is going to hell and I'm driving the bus"
"Don't criticize my mess unless you'd like to become part of it."
"I have a mind like a steel trap; it is rusty and illegal in 47 states"
"A good essay is 10% inspiration, 15% perspiration, and 75% desperation"
"It is not MY fault that I never learned to accept responsibility"!
I'm an angel, honest! The horns are just there to keep the halo straight
If at first you don't succeed, cheat, repeat until caught, and then lie!
The entire world's a stage; I didn't get cast!
Consciousness- that annoying time between naps
Suburbia - where they cut down trees and name streets after them
"Behind every good man there is a good woman and behind that another man looking at her ass"
I love him, O yes I do,
He's for me, not for you,
And if by chance you take my place,
I'll take my fist and smash your face!
"God made mud, God made dirt, God made guys so girls could flirt!"
Guys are like lava lamps they're fun to look at just not so bright!
"Loves a two-way street and I think your car just died"
It takes 42 muscles to smile, so instead pick up your middle finger and say bite me in a bitchy tone!
Every morning is the dawn of a new error
Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder
Sign on baby's bib: SPIT HAPPENS
Copywight 1994 Elmer Fudd. All wights wesewved
Dain bramaged
Buy a Pentium 586/90 so you can reboot faster
Access denied--nah nah na nah nah!
Ethernet (n): something used to catch the etherbunny
Beware of programmers who carry screwdriver
OUT TO LUNCH: IF NOT BACK BY FIVE, OUT FOR DINNER ALSO
A repair shop:
WE CAN REPAIR ANYTHING. (PLEASE KNOCK HARD ON THE DOOR - THE BELL DOESN'T WORK)
A Laundromat:
PLEASE REMOVE ALL YOUR CLOTHING WHEN THE LIGHT GOES OUT
Men, chocolate, and coffee are all better rich.
"Keep smiling, it makes people wonder what you're up to."
Procrastinate now, don't put it off.
Never think about the mistakes you made. Think about the mistakes you will make.
All trespassers will be shot on sight. All survivors will then be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law. Have a nice day!
"We are going to rip off your testicles.......and slash your tires." - Nip
I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.
42.7% of all statistics are made up on the spot.
A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.
The sooner you fall behind the more time you'll have to catch up.
All those who believe in telekinesis, raise my hand.
The early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
OK, so what's the speed of dark?
Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.
Hard work pays off in the future, laziness pays off now.
I intend to live forever -- so far, so good.
If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?
Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.
What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
My mechanic told me, "I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder."
Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?
A conclusion is the part where you got tired of thinking.
Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.
The only reason I am always listening to music is to drown out the sound of your voice!
"Careful with that light at the end of the tunnel, it might be another train coming."
Don't drink and drive you might spill your beer.
If you can't fix it with duck tape you haven't used enough
Smile, and the world will smile with you. Laugh and they'll all think you're on drugs.
Where there's a will, there's a way. And where there's a way, then there's usually a stop sign somewhere along the road.
loved by some, hated by many, envied by most, yet wanted by plenty!
"I didn't lose my mind, I sold it on ebay."
Constipated People Don't Give A crap.
If You Can Read This, I've Lost My Trailer.
The Earth Is Full - Go Home.
So Many Pedestrians - So Little Time.
Cleverly Disguised As A Responsible Adult.
If We Quit Voting, Will They All Go Away?
Eat Right, Exercise, Die Anyway.
Illiterate? Write For Help
Honk If Anything Falls Off.
Cover Me, I'm Changing Lanes.
He Who Hesitates Is Not Only Lost, But Miles From The Next Exit.
You! Out Of The Gene Pool - Now!
I Do Whatever My Rice Krispies Tell Me To.
Fight Crime: Shoot Back!
Remember Folks: Stop Lights Timed For 35 mph Are Also Timed For 70 mph.
Guys: No Shirt, No Service. Gals: No Shirt, No Charge
If Walking Is So Good For You, Then Why Does My Mailman Look Like Jabba The Hut?
Boldly Going Nowhere.
Caution - Driver Legally Blonde.
Honk If You've Never Seen An Uzi Fired From A Car Window.
How Many Roads Must A Man Travel Down Before He Admits He is Lost?
All Men Are Animals; Some Just Make Better Pets.
"POLITICIANS & DIAPERS BOTH NEED TO BE CHANGED, AND FOR THE SAME REASON"
"i'm not tailgating, i'm keeping up with the pace car"
Roadhead cures Roadrage...
Tell your girlfriend I said thanks
" WARNING: in case of rapture, this car will be driverless. "
normal people worry me
you say physco like it's a bad thing
those who think they know everything, annoy those of us that do
This delinquent is having sex with your honor student.
Save the environment...plant a Bush back in Texas.
don't regret doing things, regret getting caught
None of us are virgins, life has screwed us all
"my tears for you are like dark chocolate- bitter sweet and probably no good for me."
If you love somebody, they shouldn't make you cry, they should be worth crying over.
"I'm going to live life or die trying"
im sugar and spice and everything nice if u wanna mess with me u better think twice
"We didn’t lose.....we just ran out of time"
"Here officer, hold my beer while I find my license."
"You will be aroused by a shampoo comercial."--Homer J. Simpson
If you die, I'll kill you!"
The only reason that I talk to myself is because that I'm the only one whose answers I accept.
"Find a guy that adores you and not one that you adore!!" MOM
Learn from the mistakes of others, because you can't live long enough to make them all yourself.
"Birdie, birdie, in the sky, why'd you do that in my eye? Looks like sugar, tastes like sap. OMG! IT'S BIRDIE CRAP!"
"Inside this body lies that of a skinny lady. But I can usually shut her up with chocolate."
They say the truth will set you free. But then why is it that every time I tell the truth I get sent to my room?
Men are like pennies: two-faced and worthless.
You tried, and you failed, so the lesson is, never try. - Homer J. Simpson.
"Is tuna really Chicken?" - Jessica Simpson, after reading "Tuna, Chicken of the sea"
"I did my homework! I just forgot to write it down."
Roses are red, violets are blue, please flush the toilet, after you.
"Some people drink from the fountain of knowledge, others just gurgle."
"When they put unknown at the end of a quote, that means they probably don't no how to spell anonymous" -unknown
"I'll kill you until you die!!"
"I'm not scared of dying, I just don't want to!"
"Dilbert's Words of Wisdom: You're slower than a herd of turtles stampeding through peanut butter."
"I tried sniffing coke once, but the ice cubes stuck in my nose"
"The whole world is going to hell and I'm driving the bus"
"Don't criticize my mess unless you'd like to become part of it."
"I have a mind like a steel trap; it is rusty and illegal in 47 states"
"A good essay is 10% inspiration, 15% perspiration, and 75% desperation"
"It is not MY fault that I never learned to accept responsibility"!
I'm an angel, honest! The horns are just there to keep the halo straight
If at first you don't succeed, cheat, repeat until caught, and then lie!
The entire world's a stage; I didn't get cast!
Consciousness- that annoying time between naps
Suburbia - where they cut down trees and name streets after them
"Behind every good man there is a good woman and behind that another man looking at her ass"
I love him, O yes I do,
He's for me, not for you,
And if by chance you take my place,
I'll take my fist and smash your face!
"God made mud, God made dirt, God made guys so girls could flirt!"
Guys are like lava lamps they're fun to look at just not so bright!
"Loves a two-way street and I think your car just died"
It takes 42 muscles to smile, so instead pick up your middle finger and say bite me in a bitchy tone!
Every morning is the dawn of a new error
Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder
Sign on baby's bib: SPIT HAPPENS
Copywight 1994 Elmer Fudd. All wights wesewved
Dain bramaged
Buy a Pentium 586/90 so you can reboot faster
Access denied--nah nah na nah nah!
Ethernet (n): something used to catch the etherbunny
Beware of programmers who carry screwdriver
OUT TO LUNCH: IF NOT BACK BY FIVE, OUT FOR DINNER ALSO
A repair shop:
WE CAN REPAIR ANYTHING. (PLEASE KNOCK HARD ON THE DOOR - THE BELL DOESN'T WORK)
A Laundromat:
PLEASE REMOVE ALL YOUR CLOTHING WHEN THE LIGHT GOES OUT
Sunday, July 18, 2010
Jar of Hearts
i know i can’t take one more step towards you
cause all thats waiting is regret
don’t you know i’m not your ghost anymore
you lost the love i loved the most
i learned to live, half alive
and now you want me one more time
who do you think you are?
runnin’ ’round leaving scars
collecting a jar of hearts
tearing love apart
you’re gonna catch a cold
from the ice inside your soul
don’t come back for me
who do you think you are?
i hear you’re asking all around
if i am anywhere to be found
but i have grown too strong
to ever fall back in your arms
ive learned to live, half alive
and now you want me one more time
who do you think you are?
runnin’ ’round leaving scars
collecting a jar of hearts
and tearing love apart
you’re gonna catch a cold
from the ice inside your soul
don’t come back for me
who do you think you are?
it took so long just to feel alright
remember how to put back the light in my eyes
i wish i had missed the first time that we kissed
cause you broke all your promises
and now you’re back
you don’t get to get me back
who do you think you are?
running around leaving scars
collecting a jar of hearts
and tearing love apart
you’re gonna catch a cold
from the ice inside your soul
so don’t come back for me
dont come back at all
cause all thats waiting is regret
don’t you know i’m not your ghost anymore
you lost the love i loved the most
i learned to live, half alive
and now you want me one more time
who do you think you are?
runnin’ ’round leaving scars
collecting a jar of hearts
tearing love apart
you’re gonna catch a cold
from the ice inside your soul
don’t come back for me
who do you think you are?
i hear you’re asking all around
if i am anywhere to be found
but i have grown too strong
to ever fall back in your arms
ive learned to live, half alive
and now you want me one more time
who do you think you are?
runnin’ ’round leaving scars
collecting a jar of hearts
and tearing love apart
you’re gonna catch a cold
from the ice inside your soul
don’t come back for me
who do you think you are?
it took so long just to feel alright
remember how to put back the light in my eyes
i wish i had missed the first time that we kissed
cause you broke all your promises
and now you’re back
you don’t get to get me back
who do you think you are?
running around leaving scars
collecting a jar of hearts
and tearing love apart
you’re gonna catch a cold
from the ice inside your soul
so don’t come back for me
dont come back at all
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Good night and joy be with you all
Of all the money that e`er I spent
I`ve spent it in good company
And all the harm that ever I did
Alas it was to none but me
And all I`ve done for want of wit
To memory now I can`t recall
So fill to me the parting glass
Good night and joy be with you all
If I had money enough to spend
And leisure to sit awhile
There is a fair maid in the town
That sorely has my heart beguiled
Her rosy cheeks and ruby lips
I own she has my heart enthralled
So fill to me the parting glass
Good night and joy be with you all
Oh, all the comrades that e`er I had
They`re sorry for my going away
And all the sweethearts that e`er I had
They`d wish me one more day to stay
But since it falls unto my lot
That I should rise and you should not
I`ll gently rise and softly call
Good night and joy be with you all
I`ve spent it in good company
And all the harm that ever I did
Alas it was to none but me
And all I`ve done for want of wit
To memory now I can`t recall
So fill to me the parting glass
Good night and joy be with you all
If I had money enough to spend
And leisure to sit awhile
There is a fair maid in the town
That sorely has my heart beguiled
Her rosy cheeks and ruby lips
I own she has my heart enthralled
So fill to me the parting glass
Good night and joy be with you all
Oh, all the comrades that e`er I had
They`re sorry for my going away
And all the sweethearts that e`er I had
They`d wish me one more day to stay
But since it falls unto my lot
That I should rise and you should not
I`ll gently rise and softly call
Good night and joy be with you all
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
Saturday, July 3, 2010
Europe :(
Everytime I look at pics of Europe from all the people who go on exchange there, it makes my heart ache so bad it makes me wanna pack my bags today and move there. It reminds me each time of Heidi and some other books I read in my childhood about farms and sheep and goats and farm animals and stuff like that. I really want to settle there someday. I know its a fairytale image I have in my head, but I can't get it out.
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