ShitMyFriendsSay

So I have very interesting friends, who say the randomest things. So I shall record them down here, as and when they are said, for the amusement of all.

Me: Hey are you still sick?
Classmate: No I just have an allergy to mornings.

Friend 1:

(sighing over the general lack of a job) Yaar, if only we could win a lottery.
Me: Ya but they would give us all the money at one go and we would spend it all very quickly.
Friend: Isn't there a way they could keep it in an account and pay us a monthly stipend?
(Something to look into, lottery companies)

We should have prison tags you know, both of us. And the control in other person's hand. Then whenever we're bummy lazy then just press button and shock each other.

(In reference to Career Fair) I can't believe I just did that. All those engineering companies and I walked out like I was the chef of some Italian cuisine.

Arranged toh mere kutte ki bhi shaadi nahi hogi (even my dog won't have an arranged marriage)

Why can't guys just have periods and have kids?

Can I chant bum-bum-bum to the tune of your clock ticking?

I slept off by mistake. Then woke up and pondered over mistake. Then cannot sleep till I finish these notes, so now chatting with you.

To self: Shut up and do the tutorial. Don't go upside down on the bed.

Why do you need to change everytime after a shower?

Do you think if we were born blonde, we would have been caught as being stupid earlier?

Your earrings look different upside down.

Friend 2:

You know what, there are around 6 billion people on this planet, and so 3 billion females(ladies). So, if you were to date one "lady" each day, you would still not date all in your lifetime. Something to think about :P

I understand why guys get into relationships with gals. But why do gals get into relationships with guys?

Don't worry about getting a job right now. Worry about it only on weekends. (HOW do you switch off your brain? :O )

Friend 3:

Swati, if I kill someone, will you defend me?
(Me: I will help you plead insanity.)

Friend 4:

Prof: Heisenberg came up with the uncertainty principle and shocked the world.
Friend: Where did he get a battery that big? :O

How does the double slit experiment work?
Rajnikant stares at the electron and it splits into 2 and each part goes through one of the 2 slits. Hence explained.

(In reference to a discussion on stars and sun signs, due to a certain Star Gazing assignment) There is one planet which affects all of us. It is called the earth.

(Because the clouds were blocking Jupiter and the queue towards the telescope was not moving) I wish I could get a giant fan and blow all the clouds away.

You know the rain is just clouds sweating. Like when we run, we sweat and lose weight.


I am working part-time, and I get very interesting questions asked sometimes, like...

How do I become a forensic investigator?

I know the document submission deadline is tomorrow. What if I can't submit then?
Me: Why haven't you been able to get it done?
I am a little careless, so I did not bother doing it.

... to be updated regularly